WikiLeekZ just in: Huge Vegas ‘Bet On Death’ (BOD) ©  IPO to Launch

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ announces that salivating High Rollers and Whales as well as legions of excited beginners are descending upon Las Vegas in hordes in anticipation of the opportunity of cashing in on future massacres in the US.

A shadowy Crypto-Multi-Billionaire based in Las Vegas and Nigeria will soon launch an IPO called

 ‘Bet on Death’  *(BOD)

Bets must be placed in Las Vegas-offering a boon to the gaming/tourist industry in Nevada!

It will be an international betting platform based offshore. BOD will list possible locations, deaths & injured, type of weapon (s) used for the slaughter, age of shooter(s) and other interesting wagers for the next mass murder in the US. BOD enthusiastically tells WikiLeekZ, in an exclusive interview, that the betting possibilities are virtually endless. (Mass murder for betting purposes, is defined as 6 or more deaths).

BOD goes on to state to WikiLeekZ that there is a huge treasure trove of data points to analyze due to the incredible number of massacres in the US in recent memory…thus enabling BOD’s quants to fix probabilities in precise ways.

In addition, BOD tells WikiLeekZ that extra Bonus points will be awarded to the lucky bettor if the correct venue is guessed. For example you’ve predicted the location, now prophesize the venue; a school, church, a theatre (what movie is showing?), an ice cream parlor, a shopping center or an NBA, MLB or NFL game day venue.

 A Bonus is also awarded for correct answers as to grade level, religious denomination and if there is a correct guess if there is Cinnabon in the food court of a shopping center and what movie is on the theatre screen at the time of the mass killing..

Another Bonus is to guess the age of the shooter.

So, beginning with the location (within 25 miles) and predicting the correct answers plus Bonus answers, all the way to the last question, as much as $75,000,000 could be won by the lucky bettor..

To guard against a bettor putting his finger on the scale, BOD cautions that the bettor must sign an agreement stating that he will be hung in Times Square on NY Eve if he is found guilty of conspiring to choose and act upon the time, place and victims of the massacre. In that case, next of kin to the dead will each receive $10,000 as compensation.

Yes, there is an added progressive Jackpot of $1,000,000 rolling over for each week of massacre inactivity in the US.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

*Yes, since you asked, BOD was chosen for its imagery.

This just in…Proponents of a Massacres Futures Exchange© have applied for a license to operate in Macao to take advantage of the blood-letting spree in America.

It is thought that the Chinese government will act quickly to approve the exchange.  WikiLeekZ is not certain how the exchange will work, but acknowledges its great potential for a quick buck. America is now reaching its potential as a land of opportunity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WikiLeekZ asks-

Q         Why don’t we have gun safety laws in America?

The answer is really very simple; any 4^th grader in Uvalde could figure that one out, if she were not Dead.

A         Because those who vote against expanded gun safety laws are either immoral, greedy bastards who drink from the overflowing blood-filled chalice of money and power offered by the NRA and gun lobby in America

Or

A         They’re…well, there is no other answer

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ IS the NEWZ Today      

 

WikiLeekZ    ‘I read the news today-oh boy’…nineteen kids killed in Uvalde’

A WikiTorial

After 19 elementary school kids and two teachers were gunned down yesterday….                                                                                                                                                  “We’re a small community, and we will need your prayers to get through this,” the superintendent of the Uvalde, Texas, school district said.

WikiLeekZ resoundingly says-

NO, that’s not what you f*cking need. You need to demand that the R (Republican) lawmakers pass intelligent, life-saving gun control legislation. Then and only then, will you convince me that you care a god-damned fig about the kids who are in your charge.

How have thoughts and prayers helped any of the shootings that have become so commonplace in America? These days, most of the country reads a horrific article, watches grieving parents on TV and listens to god-dammed hypocritical R’s send their thoughts and prayers and then immediately go to the bank to cash their fat gun lobby checks.

I won’t ask the question-“Have you no shame” because most of us know the answer. You have NO shame, no humanity, no caring and no sense of honor.

WTF!  Nearly 200 of you R’s just voted against the Access to Baby Formula Act…to help get needed formula to American babies! Have you actually, collectively lost your minds? Have you no shame? I already know the answer…I don’t even know why I ask it after Sandy Hook and many, many other senseless shootings.

Of course you have no sense of compassion, nor do your so-called ‘constituents’ /supporters. Yes, I’m talking about you-Republican voters. If you are a Republican today, you besmirch the party of Lincoln.

You R office seekers spend most of your time campaigning to ban abortion then forget about the precious human life after it comes enters the world.

You campaign with American flags waving grandly behind you and turn around and do all that you can to limit voting by those you assume will not agree with your positions and consequently not vote for you.

You R’s know you cannot win a fair election, so you manipulate, distort and lie about the voting process and along the way, dig yourselves deeper into the pit of shame and in the end, a life without purpose or redemption.

You R’s are still campaigning on the issue of ‘stop the steal’, on school prayers, to lower taxes on the ultra-rich, on the best way to take the LGBT community back to the 1800’s where job discrimination, violence and jail were the watchwords.

You f*cking R’s are batshit crazy. You don’t care about a kinder, more equal country that tries to lift up all of its citizens by providing educational and job opportunities and access to life changing medical care.

You R’s voters sit back and pretend you don’t know anything about whatever new/old hate-filled, stupid, dangerous screed that pops into the vacant cavity above the shoulders of trump, Cawthorne, MTG, Gosar and their compadres.

R leadership is antediluvian, self –centered, cruel and greedy and if you’re a R and vote for those troglodytes, you’re no better, maybe worse because you’ve put them into office and when they’ve proven themselves to be mean-spirited and inhumane, you turned a blind eye; you said or did nothing to stop the killing in America, you did not react to castigate those who would prevent babies from eating and applauded Putin-lover trump time and time again.

I’ve written so many difficult, disheartening, pleading essays on the shootings in America that I could reach into my file, close my eyes and pull one out; then change the number of murdered Americans and the location of the massacre and the essay would be appropriate for Uvalde, Sandy Hook and all of the others.  

Do you honestly want your place in the history books of the future to be a part of what the R Party stands for these last few years? If your answer is YES, our country is in deep, deep trouble and I pity you and your betrayal of humanity. If your answer is NO-you know what you must do.

WikiLeekZ IS the NEWZ Today.                         

 

 

WikiLeekZ’s  new way of choosing Supreme Court Justices

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

The next time a republican president has an opportunity to appoint a justice…The US Senate simply says “okay, whoever you choose is fine because no matter what he/she says in the hearing, it makes no difference what they will actually say or rule once in their somber black robe”.

Why even have Senate hearings to approve Supreme Court Justices?

The last 4 Republican nominees have blatantly lied and are facing no consequences-let alone have they been embarrassed or humiliated for their hypocrisy

Just let the next sanctimonious, craven, right wing Republican president appoint the new Justice and do away with the faux, ‘show’ hearings.

They’re absolutely meaningless.

What’s the point of a confirmation hearing if candidates either lie with impunity- without compunction or refuse to answer legitimate legal questions posed to them? Or if they outright deny what they have said or done in the past?

What’s the point?

This is where America is now; this is what we have become!

Let’s save money, time, and newsprint and do away with the hypocrisy of it all. Just let the Federalist Society choose the next Justice.

This is what America has become. A nation with a large percentage of lying citizens whose craven lust for power has stripped them of all decency and honor. A nation of millions of Americans whose hypocrisy knows no bounds.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

 

Larry Elder Claims Victory

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

Late last night, despite California election official’s accounts, Republican Larry Elder claimed victory in the Gov Newsome recall election. Elder claimed that because more counties in California voted to recall the governor, he should be the governor today.

Despite the landslide popular votes cast in favor of retaining Newsome…more than 70%, Elder is crying foul, is calling the election ‘RIGGED’ and intends to contest the rigged election.

Elder claims that the ballot question was confusing and that those who voted NO were actually saying that ‘NO, they don’t want Newsome as governor of California’. He demanded that the greatest literary minds in America - from the top academic institutions such as Oral Roberts University, Hillsdale College and Liberty University decide on the wording of the ballot measure.

Elder is backing up his claim by stating that the more than 20 California counties whose majority votes went against Newsome, will, because of an ancient, arcane, little-known clause in the California constitution, form their own state...to be called the ‘State of Elder People’ with Elder declared ‘Lawrence of the State of Elder People’.

‘President Larry’ has the undying backing of trump and the two will broadcast an ‘unbelievably powerful, thoughtful, truth-telling’ radio show from rural Northern California. The first goal of the two will be to declare The State of Elder People’ the nations’ 51^st state, sent two Senators to WDC and overturn the current Democratic majority in the Senate.

trump, who is expected to be Emperor of TSOEP  will divide his time between the State of Elder, Mar a Lago, Trump Tower, Bedminster Golf and CC and his golf courses in Scotland between visits to Putin, Erdogan, Hungary, Saudi Arabia and N Korea.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday.

trump Chickens Out on 20th Anniversary  September 11th  Ceremonies.

 WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

Because well-known braggadocio, coward trump would be have to share the stage with President Biden and 3 former US presidents today at 9/11 memorial ceremonies, Underdog trump is chickening out and chose to be the Under card commentator at the clown show ‘boxing’ match between Evander Holyfield and the UFC champion at a Florida casino on the 20 th anniversary of 9/11.

Evidentially, trump has reasoned that being at a boxing match is what ‘real’ men do, not attend sissy ceremonies. trump, instead, will be pocketing an “obscene” amount of money at a ‘boxing’ match and basking in the adulation of screaming MMA fans in Hollywood, FL

How fitting that the greediest, most cowardly president in American history would avoid honoring more than 3,000 innocent first responders and victims by chickening out of a memorial service commemorating a defining event in American history. Presidents Biden, Obama, Bush and Clinton will all be present as will VP Cheney, Speaker Pelosi and Leader Schumer.

trump proposed to make a special 5 minute 9/11 address to the nation but couldn’t find any media takers for his $2 million appearance fee.

trump, true to form, has chosen to continue the fleecing and grifting that has characterized his adult life. His astounding lack of human empathy and self-awareness is comprehensible only to the 86% of Republicans and a few million other MAGA Americans who follow that poor specimen of human development.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

 

“All hope abandon ye who enter here.”-Dante

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

Dante re-emerges to rewrite The Inferno to include infamous individuals of the American 21^nd Century

Dante Alighieri, who ostensibly died in Ravello in 1321, has incredibly re-emerged to put quill to parchment. Dante, in his divine manner, has chosen to unambiguously include the names of Gov DeSantis, Gov Abbott, Hannity, Ingraham, Tucker Carlson and others in Circles 8 and 9 of The Inferno for their sins of fraud and treachery.

In a nationally televised interview conducted by Walter Cronkite and watched by thousands of literary students, Mr Alighieri explained that he was exhausted from rolling over in his grave as he perceived numerous acts of treachery exhibited by De Santis, Abbott et al as they condemned mask and Covid vaccine mandates even while thousands of their citizens were needlessly dying from Covid 19. “And I know about the Plague” stated Mr Alighieri.  

Mr Alighieri explained that since Guttenberg was no longer in business, he prevailed upon Harper-Collins to publish his revised copy of The Inferno, which should be completed any century now and go on sale at your local pharmacy.

“And that’s the way it is”

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday