Trump Wrote His Own
College Letter of Recommendation
WikiLeekZ is Our Name...Satire is Our Game
It came to light recently that Trump dictated his own
medical report. WikiLeekZ has discovered a trove of copies of other
Trump-written, self-serving letters in an old leather trunk in a New Jersey warehouse.
Evidentially, Trump has been writing false author letters for decades.
WikiLeekZ has in its possession, dozens of letters written
by Donald Trump under various Noms des Plumes ranging from a Mother’s
Day letter to college application letters of recommendation to purported
financial documents from accounting firms and many responses to ‘Dear John’
letters.
Samples below:
Letter accompanying
Trump’s college applications
To Whom It May Concern,
I have been the private after-school tutor for Donald John Trump
during the past 10 years. I am pleased to announce to the world that Mr Trump has
amazingly excelled in all of his studies with me from Algebra to Zoology and
has shown an astonishingly incredible intelligence in every subject we have
studied.
He has always been on time to our class, has never uttered a
cross word and has shown a remarkable patience when pointing out my lack of
understanding of advance particle physics. I can unequivocally state that
Donal J Trump has had the best attitude and study habits I have ever witnessed and
when he enters your hallowed institution, he will be the best student ever to
graduate from your university.
In the last 12 months alone, he has learned Swahili,
mastered the game of Go and has read the collected works of Dante, Plato and
Sun Tzu in the original languages. He has also excelled at 4 major sports and
volunteered with Mother Teresa in India for 2 weeks. His physical strength and
stamina are absolutely extraordinary.
Donald J Trump has decided to spend his time in study thus finding
no time for girls, tobacco or liquor.
Sincerely,
Joe Jones, Professor Emeritus, Trump University
Letter to His mother
on Mother’s Day
Dear Mother of Donald J Trump,
You must be the most beautiful, most intelligent and most resourceful
mother in history…just look at me, your son!
I’m great, Mother, as you certainly know! There is no one
you know as smart, clever and dissembling
as I am…you said it yourself when I lied to you about the cookies I
stole when you said my my, Donnie, aren’t you the clever one to blame your
brother and sister for the cookie theft even though they were away at camp! Who
else would come up with such a dissembling excuse…no one I know!....
I know that you will enjoy spending this Mother’s day just
thinking of how lucky you are to have given birth to the most handsome, most intelligent
and healthiest child in the Bronx.
My wish is for you to be able to spend many more Mother’s Days
giving thanks to me and God for the glory and respect that is reflected from me
toward you.
Sincerely,
Donald John Trump, Esq.
WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday
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