We’ve all seen news pictures of VP Pence, without a mask, walking, talking and spreading his germs around Mayo Clinic yesterday. WTF!

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

Masks? What mask? I don’t need no stinkin mask!

I’m the Veep and I get tested for CV every 12 seconds or sooner if I touch anything or if I breathe. That’s why I don’t need no stinkin mask.

And, BTW, my boss would kill me (in a figurative way, not literally, I think) if he saw me wearing a stinkin badge  sissy mask. Anyway, it’s not the macho thing to do, according to el Jefe. We don’t wear no masks in the White House or at press briefings neither. We’re men, macho men, not wimps.

Hell, even Tony and Debbie don’t wear no stinkin masks at the pressers. We want to show all Americans that there is nothing to be worried about and even if there was, we wouldn’t tell you.

Everything is fine in Morning in America. By the way, washing hands is not all that it’s cracked up to be.

So, go out, see movies, eat at packed diners and get your hair trimmed as you workout. It’s America, we’re the greatest and soon, very soon, el jefe assures me, we will be at zero.

(He didn’t mean zero Americans left, did he?)

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

This guy is in charge of our national coronavirus response so it's little wonder it's been a complete catastrophe. 

trump to Volunteer in Experiment for his Country

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

“and then I said suppose you brought the light inside the body, which you can do either through the skin or in some other way”- trump April 23, 2020 press conference

“Then I see the disinfectant where it knocks it out in a minute, one minute. Is there a way we can do something like that by injection inside?” -trump April 23, 2020 press conference

trump and his new head of the Corona virus task force, former professional Labradoodle breeder, Brian Harrison, are combining their considerable experience and expertise in pure science to embark upon what they believe will be a game- changing experiment that will save the world…and billions of people.

trump will take a Hydroxychloroquine tablet and wash it down with a pint of Clorox disinfectant followed by a Lysol chaser.

He will then be injected with 50cc’s of Fabreeze into his hefty buttocks and while in that area, a greased- up ultra-violet, battery-operated tube will be turned on and inserted into his ample rear end.

After which, a light bulb-shaped ultra-violet light will be placed in his mouth and plugged in.

trump will continue this regimen for 7-10 days after which he guarantees that he will swim across the Potomac* and conduct a press conference on the opposite side, near the Pentagon.

Ladbrokes in London and touts in Las Vegas are giving very generous odds for anyone willing to bet on trump lasting 2 days and astronomically favorable odds for those willing to take a chance on making it across the Potomac.

WikiLeekZ swears it has seen Melania earnestly encouraging trump to show America how strong he really is.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

*Trump aims to replicate 73 year old Mao Zedong’s 1966 swim across the Yangtze River.

trump University Awards trump a Doctorate in Virology, Epidemiology and Biomedical Research

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ has learned that trump, with his newly minted degree will take the position recently held by the fired Dr Rick Bright.

Now that trump has his scientific credentials, he will add the director of the Department of Health and Human Services’ Biomedical Advanced Research and Development Authority to his portfolio.

He was considering filling the position with Jared, but Jared’s gold-framed sheepskin (suitable for hanging), in Biomedical Research from trump University hadn’t yet arrived in the mail.

WikiLeekZ notes that Rumor and Common Sense dictate that Dr. Bright was removed from his post by trump for pushing back against trump’s unfounded hyping of hydroquinone as a COVID 19 Miracle Cure.

Saying that the drug is “being tested now,” trump said that “there are some very strong, powerful signs” of its potential,   “But what do I know? I’m not a doctor,” trump added.   “What do you have to lose?” 

WikiLeekZ now believes that trump feels, with his Highly Regarded trump University degree, he can speak more authoritatively on the subject and that with his degree and being head of Biomedical Research, he will no longer need the counsel of doctors, scientists and epidemiologists to lead the country through the dangerous seas of Corona virus.  

‘Full speed ahead, what iceberg, I don’t see an iceberg and if it is an iceberg, it’s a Fake Iceberg’.-trump

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be One Day

They All Can’t Be That Stupid, Can They?

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ may have uncovered a plot by left wing activists to decrease the right wing crazy crowd before the November elections.

There is a rumor that a number of well-heeled old guard lefties are bankrolling the ‘Don’t Tread on Me”, MAGA gear-wearing, AK-47- TOTING,  Confederate Flag-waving & Open Michiganders who protested Gov  Whitmer’s social distancing and  shelter at home policies in Lansing.

In Lansing, MI, it seemed that the crowd of thousands of wing-nut protesters were mostly whining about their inability to go swimming, paint their houses or mow their lawns. So, according to the anecdotal lefty plan, 1000’s of trump supporters  were convinced to gather  cheek to jowl chanting  ‘lock her up’ in Michigan’s state capital. Only a few hypocrites were wearing masks.

The old guard leftie coalition is thought to be hoping that enough right wing Trumpistas who attended the rally will become ill with the Corona Virus and spread it among their cohorts, thus thinning the herd before the November elections.

Similar rallies are taking place in Texas, Maryland and other states…all backed and encouraged by trump’s irrational tweets…“LIBERATE MINNESOTA!” “LIBERATE MICHIGAN!” “LIBERATE VIRGINIA,”…all states that will be battlegrounds in the 2020 presidential election.

To be ‘perfectly clear’, rumor has it that the old lefties do not wish death to befall this group of nuts…just get the plague and be in isolation at home or in a health care facility until after November.

Why else would thousands of people be induced to attend a crowded rally and risk contracting a deadly virus? They all can’t be that stupid, can they?

Getting them to go out to beaches and churches is the next project.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

.

An UN-Harmonic Convergence is Fast Approaching

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

trump is suddenly becoming horrified at the prospect that one day, very soon, the Dow Jones Industrial Average which stands at 23,719 today (April 10, 2020) will converge with and be equal to the number of Corona virus Deaths in the US, which today, is 16,686 Americans.

To WikiLeekZ, it has always seemed as if the Stock Market numbers were always more important to trump than the number of illnesses and deaths of his fellow citizens brought about by the Corona virus. To WikiLeekZ, it appears as if trump was doing more to prop up the market than keeping Americans alive. In trump’s mind, the market trumps lives for re-election.

In the old days…a few weeks ago, when trump was crowing that there were only 15 cases and no deaths in the US, he didn’t feel the least bit threatened by such a convergence. Although the market was cratering, it was still at 23,081…far from a convergence. Consequently, he did nothing of consequence.

Feb. 26: “And again, when you have 15 people, and the 15 within a couple of days is going to be down to close to zero, that’s a pretty good job we’ve done.” — Trump at a press conference.

It seemed unlikely that the market would sink to double digits and equal deaths-especially since trump forecasted close to ZERO cases within days.

Now, however, the ghoulish reality is that unless there is Divine Intervention halting the deaths by Corona or an unheard-of skyrocketing stock market, it won’t be long until trump’s nightmare will become his new Reality Show headline. Deaths in the US continue to rise.

There is wide-spread betting across the land as to when those numbers will be equal and a corollary bet as to whether trump will appear on that day at his daily Reality Show press conference with yet another lying explanation while casting blame on another person, country, the weather or space invaders.

WikiLeekZ is hoping for Divine Intervention.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

Devil’s Island, St Helena and the Château d'If are all Under Consideration.

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

The World Court in The Hague has taken up the knotty question of where to quarantine trump, Johnson and Bolsonaro. The world is clamoring to put them all together in a comfortable prison hospital ward so that Boris Johnson’s Corona virus can be treated properly. trump and Bolsonaro will be well-cared for after they catch the Corona virus from Johnson. Devil’s Island, St Helena and the Château d'If are all under consideration for their 3 year sojourn.

No need to quarantine these 3 guys separately, based on what they have said and done these past 3-4 months. To remind you, below are some of the deeds and statements made by these great scientists and leaders of democracy.

Boris Johnson's government is under pressure to explain why it has failed to mirror other European countries in implementing widespread coronavirus testing, evidentially  it was operating under the false belief that the COVID-19 virus would only be a "moderate" risk to the UK.

"Shambles!" reads the headline in the Daily Mirror.

"550,000 NHS staff, only 2,000 tested," roars the Daily Mail.

Bolsonaro has also downplayed the threat of coronavirus, comparing it to the flu or the sniffles

“We’re all going to die one day,” Bolsonaro told supporters outside his official residents on Sunday, as he continued to defy guidance from health officials to refrain gathering in groups to slow the spread of the disease.

"This medicine here, hydroxychloroquine, is working in every place,” he pontificated to all who would listen.

 “We cannot let the cure be worse than the problem itself,” President Trump said. ...it’s going to be bad,” then suggested that “the response to the virus may have been overblown”. ...

 “This is a pandemic,” President Donald Trump said at a March 17 press conference. ... “the 15 cases today, within a couple of days is going to be down to close to zero”.

However, there is a rising global demand that the 3 be isolated from the rest of the earth’s population as they are a clear and present danger to the worlds’ safety.

The World Court seclusion provision has a clause stating that after the world-wide Corona virus plague is over, the 3 are cured and after serving their 3 year terms in jail, they will be released upon society- on probation, with the hope that they have leaned their lessons.

Next stop, Alcatraz if they ever attempt to regain power.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

THE APRIL FOOL

Isn’t it Time?

A WikiTorial 

The April Fool…no, let’s change it to the January, February, March and April Fool.

Whether he is simply stupid, is listening to Jared and Donnie, thinks that he’s doing what it takes to keep the Stock Market buoyant or believes that Happy Talk is the road his to re-election, trump has not been the leader America needs at this time of crisis.

Simply put, his actions-or inactions are leading to an untold number of needless illnesses and death in our country. He’s not only misleading his herd of ill-informed followers but is fooling the media and others when he states something that is almost reasonable and kind of believable into thinking that maybe he’s finally come to the conclusion that the Corona virus is serious.

Even so, that doesn’t account for his and his administration’s complete lack of organizational skill and planning-let alone experience in dealing with the pandemic that’s killing, yes, killing Americans at a far greater rate than had someone, anyone at all,  been plucked off the street  to lead the fight against the disease. He’s that bad and that much of a danger to every American regardless of where you live, the balance of your bank account or your ethnicity or religion.

He’s not going to change. He’s the same no-nothing, un-read, Fox-watching, braggadocio, arrogant person he’s always been and the country is suffering because of it. Why in heavens name don’t the members of his cabinet, top Republicans, and captains of the industries he trots out before the cameras make simple, honest statements telling the truth about the disease and how poorly trump is leading the nation in its quest to safe the lives of Americans.

Isn’t it time for the Cabinet to consider the 25^th Amendment in an effort to save tens of thousands of American lives? Isn’t it time for Mitch McConnell to fight for the right of Americans to live? Isn’t it time for all of the Republicans in power to rise up in unison to call for an end to trump’s dangerous, ignorant narcissistic inability to listen to science and heed medical warnings. He must not be able to continue to dictate the future of life and death of Americans.

There is no need to innumerate all of the harmful, uninformed steps he taken or not taken since January. He’s still not ordered a nation-wide stay at home order, he hasn’t used the Defense Production Act to hyper start the manufacture of PPE’s, Ventilators and other needed materials and he hasn’t addressed the nation as to the seriousness of the plague. Instead, he’s lied and misled the public about equipment being shipped and manufactured; the imminent roll out of a vaccine and the efficacy of treatments he ‘feels in his gut’ will stem the spread of the disease.

The Emperor has no clothes; he has neither Thinking Cap nor any Empathy at all for his Subjects. Why in the world is he still the Emperor? His Highness is not an existential threat, he’s an internal threat living and laying waste in our midst.

Those in power still possessing half a brain must use the tools in the Constitution to save American lives.

Zeny

BIG Newz…trump Reverses Course-Sees the Light?

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ has found a crumples up early draft copy of the president’s Wednesday News Conference opening remarks. What follows is a first draft outlining substantial changes in White House policy…

Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen of the press. Thank you very much for attending today’s news conference. I want to tell you that I appreciate your attendance and all of the hard work and long hours under demanding conditions that you all face. I also want to express my deepest sympathy to the families and friends of the two reporters who have perished while in the line of duty.

trump continued. Standing at the proper 6-8 feet alongside of me are the men and women whom America depends upon to bring us all through this terrible plague that is ravaging Americans of all ages, races and religions. We, as elected officials, must heed their scientific and medical knowledge if we are to get through this pandemic. And, we will listen to the experts and not the politicians who, like me, have absolutely no knowledge or experience with communicable diseases.

Consequently, the daily briefings will be conducted by medical and scientific experts who will give you all the unvarnished truth and advise all Americans as to our path forward as we all work together in harmony so save as many lives as possible.

I want to say 2 more things to you journalists.

First of all, please accept my apologies for the incorrect, hurtful and misleading remarks I’ve made these past 3 weeks. I realize that what I’ve said and done have led to many of our great citizens becoming ill and some even perishing. This is a shame I will never be able to live down.

Secondly, from my real heart…as you all know, today is April 1^st and I want to tell you that my previous remarks today were all to sucker you in to believing that I am a weak politician. I will never give up outing you so-called reporters as Fake News and you should know that the churches will all be open for service on that beautiful Easter morning regardless of the consequences. And, by the way, Fauci-you’re fired along with your staff of so-called experts. Jared and Don Jr will be heading up the NIH and CDC from now on. Please leave the stage now along with your Never Trumpers.

Now, let’s get down to the real news…my amazing TV ratings. As it turns out, the higher the death count, the higher my rating soar. Who would have thought it! That’s the real news in America today.

Thanks for coming suckers-there’ll be no further questions.

Happy April Fool’s Day!

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday