Thursday, May 26, 2022

 

WikiLeekZ just in: Huge Vegas ‘Bet On Death’ (BOD) ©  IPO to Launch

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

WikiLeekZ announces that salivating High Rollers and Whales as well as legions of excited beginners are descending upon Las Vegas in hordes in anticipation of the opportunity of cashing in on future massacres in the US.

A shadowy Crypto-Multi-Billionaire based in Las Vegas and Nigeria will soon launch an IPO called

 ‘Bet on Death’  *(BOD)

Bets must be placed in Las Vegas-offering a boon to the gaming/tourist industry in Nevada!

It will be an international betting platform based offshore. BOD will list possible locations, deaths & injured, type of weapon (s) used for the slaughter, age of shooter(s) and other interesting wagers for the next mass murder in the US. BOD enthusiastically tells WikiLeekZ, in an exclusive interview, that the betting possibilities are virtually endless. (Mass murder for betting purposes, is defined as 6 or more deaths).

BOD goes on to state to WikiLeekZ that there is a huge treasure trove of data points to analyze due to the incredible number of massacres in the US in recent memory…thus enabling BOD’s quants to fix probabilities in precise ways.

In addition, BOD tells WikiLeekZ that extra Bonus points will be awarded to the lucky bettor if the correct venue is guessed. For example you’ve predicted the location, now prophesize the venue; a school, church, a theatre (what movie is showing?), an ice cream parlor, a shopping center or an NBA, MLB or NFL game day venue.

 A Bonus is also awarded for correct answers as to grade level, religious denomination and if there is a correct guess if there is Cinnabon in the food court of a shopping center and what movie is on the theatre screen at the time of the mass killing..

Another Bonus is to guess the age of the shooter.

So, beginning with the location (within 25 miles) and predicting the correct answers plus Bonus answers, all the way to the last question, as much as $75,000,000 could be won by the lucky bettor..

To guard against a bettor putting his finger on the scale, BOD cautions that the bettor must sign an agreement stating that he will be hung in Times Square on NY Eve if he is found guilty of conspiring to choose and act upon the time, place and victims of the massacre. In that case, next of kin to the dead will each receive $10,000 as compensation.

Yes, there is an added progressive Jackpot of $1,000,000 rolling over for each week of massacre inactivity in the US.

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday

*Yes, since you asked, BOD was chosen for its imagery.

This just in…Proponents of a Massacres Futures Exchange© have applied for a license to operate in Macao to take advantage of the blood-letting spree in America.

It is thought that the Chinese government will act quickly to approve the exchange.  WikiLeekZ is not certain how the exchange will work, but acknowledges its great potential for a quick buck. America is now reaching its potential as a land of opportunity.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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