WikiLeekZ

The trump/Putin 2020 Election Playbook

WikiLeekZ is Our Name…Satire is Our Game

This past week, trump had a ‘no-readout’ telephone conversation with Putin. However, WikiLeekZ, with its Deep State White House ‘custodian’ got a hold of a crumpled up and thrown-in-the trash copy of a sort-of-official transcript of the conversation.

What follows is a narrative of a telephone call from Putin to trump.

trump received a congratulatory call from Putin today telling him how proud he was of Donnie for following his orders in sending in the USFG (US Federal Gestapo) to Portland and for clearing DC”s Lafayette Square  a week before that.

‘You’re doing a great job, Donnie in stamping out any glimmer of democratic protest in our Amerika. Keep suppressing any dissent and don’t be afraid to knock some heads and imprison those yellow-shirted terrorists who falsely claim to be the ‘Wall of Moms’. They simply want peace and justice-NOT law and order and a continuation of the police state you’re forming”.

trump thanked his friend, Vlad and asked if he had any other orders for him to carry out before the election.

‘Do I have orders! Get a pen and a large pad and we’ll begin with how we’ll manipulate your electoral process to guarantee your re-election’.

trump got out a Sharpie and Barr’s old, large legal pad and wrote notes furiously as Putin began reeling off his orders for trump to put into action immediately:

Distort/lie about Biden, suppress voters, cancel/move election day, contest the results, file lawsuits, demand a recount, stuff ballot boxes, confiscate ballot boxes in large cities and destroy them, tamper with voting machines, intimidate voters at polls, have ICE intimidate ‘immigrant-appearing voters at polls, reduce voting locations, send out false election data-times, locations etc., declare victory early –suppress West Coast state voting, close polls early, run out of ballots in key Democratic districts, continue/increase social media lies, October Surprise/Lie, last minute BIG lie, cause rioting on election day to intimidate voters from coming out to polls, shut down USPS for made-up reasons days before election, continue secret campaign to bribe Electors, be certain five Supreme Court justices are sufficiently bribed/intimidated,

‘Do these things, Donnie, and we’ll win the election. If it doesn’t quite work out, the  dachas for you, your family, McConnell, Barr and Steven Miller as always, will be available for you to live in as we plot your return to the presidency.’

WikiLeekZ is NOT the NEWZ, But May Be Someday